Lets have a PICNIK?

Yesterday I had a wave of emotions. I was on a roller coaster in the middle of the fair. {circus}
At a place called, WPPI.
WPPI Road Trip. {photography conference}

 Oh? You have never heard of it..... me either.

I woke up this morning and was not inspired anymore.
Infact, I wanted to just make pea soup and cry.
It was just so overwhelming.

I think I will quit this thing I called my Hobby.

 You see... I have never claimed to be a "professional photographer".

I dont actually think I will ever be.

 Being a professional at ANYTHING I have decided.. sucks.

Maybe I could be a professional coffee drinker, thats about it.

 WPPI is an AMAZING conference... I am not bad mouthing it.... because IF I were a professional, I would have loved it.

I think I should start a conference for professional coffee drinkers and just talk about all the ways you can be AWESOME at drinking coffee... my slogan "Share a CUP, and yours will overflow".

 But here is what DID happen.... No, it was not ALL bad.

• I found out that I am AN ARTIST.
• I am a good "picture taker"... but not a good "Photographer".
• I like to take pictures with my AWESOME Rebel camera, yes... I am a little bit of a Rebel.
• I love PICNIK's... and wish that I could have one everyday.
• I share a gift with NO expectation in return.
• I dont have a preference about WHAT I take pictures of.
• I have the perfect "work flow" for my life.
• I realized that I am "different and unique".
• AND I met SOME amazing "professional photographers" from MY area!
• AND I learned WHO JASMINE STAR was!! {I had NO idea she was soo cool!}

Honestly, Jasmine Star was what made the whole experience worth it.
She was what I paid $149.00 dollars to see.. {and that great lunch!}
I knew I liked her the second she took off her coat and said "Keep it real... Im HOT, Im sweaty, and I am going to take my coat off!".... {meanwhile she sported a very classy wifebeater tank top.

She was inspiring.

She was REAL.
She had good advice.
She was amazing.
{and she had some amazing Madonna arms!}

She made me THINK about why I am doing this thing called "photography".

Was it because I wanted to be a GOOD picture taker. No.
Was it because I wanted to be recognized? No.

I originally bought my camera because I had THIS blog. I wanted descent pictures. Mine sucked.

I bought my camera and was tickled... I mean, it was a BRAND new Rebel!
I started taking pictures, and enjoyed it.
then people started asking ME to take pictures for them.
I started charging.
I started getting more jobs.

You see... I did it because I had THIS blog.. and wanted MY story to be displayed well.

I wanted it to be ALL about my story...

I think I need to hit by RESET button, and go back to WHY I started doing this.

I want to succeed at being a good Mother, a good WIFE, and a GOOD story teller......
I want to help other people, and still take "good pictures"... but I want to be inspired and helpful to others.

Hmmmmppfffff..... Maybe one day I will be a "professional photographer".

But after yesterday, I decided... I am going to stick to coffee and picnik's...for awhile..

This picture makes me laugh... {My friend Michelle Newell is in the back row with JASMINE STAR!}
I am there in the front, the green dress... "WHAT the H*LL and I doing here!" look on my face.
Yes.. that is how I felt.
I set my CUP of Coffee down, RIGHT before this picture was taken.....